Mateja Petje Love Yourself. That’s right! Love yourself! Our society makes us believe, even though there have been “changes”, that we need somebody else to make us complete. Remember the line in Jerry McGuire “You complete me.”
As young girls, we all believe that one day we will meet that special person who will take our breath away but also our sorrows as well. They will miraculously make us whole and happy so that we won’t have to do it on our own.
While it’s true that our need to belong is one of our basic needs, as discussed by Maslow (check out his hierarchy of needs) we CAN and should love ourselves first – we are all part of this divine consciousness, and belief in separation can create pain and feeling all alone.
Mateja Petje Love Yourself-Love yourself first
In my clinical practice, I tell my clients – love yourself first. Without having love, compassion and respect for yourself, how can you expect others to love you. Erich Fromm writes in his little book The Art of Loving (which is still a classic) that “most people see the problem of love primarily as that of being loved, rather than that of one’s capacity to love.” (p. I). He also quotes Meister Eckhart: “If you love yourself, you love everybody else as you do yourself.” (p. 53).
Mateja Petje Love Yourself-10 ways to love yourself
1. Take time for daily reflection, meditation and celebrating of you and all your accomplishments. Find out what you like, what you dislike and what are your deal-breakers in the relationship. This way, you will not be so quick to jump into another co-dependent relationship and you will know yourself enough to ask for what you need. 2. Learn a new hobby, maybe something that you have been postponing for a long time as you had to consult and compromise when in a relationship. 3. Take a trip, alone, with your friends, or with a group of new people. There are travel agencies that specialize in trips just for women. How great that you can be “selfish” and not having to compromise with your significant other. Experiences also make you a much more interesting and well-rounded person. 4. Do volunteer work. Think about what skills and talents you have that you could help others less fortunate. Who knows what this can evolve in to and where it could lead you.
Mateja Petje Love Yourself-10 ways to love yourself (cont.)
5. Take more challenges and risk in your career without having to worry about what your partner or husband/wife would say. Remember that you are the creator of your life and you can create a life of your dreams. 6. Go back to school and earn a degree that you put on a back burner for a while as you were worried about not having enough time or support to follow your dreams. 7. Adopt a pet. Pets are great companions and during the inevitable times of loneliness they will be your best friends! They will force you to go out and exercise which will also help rise your serotonin levels – your happy hormones! 8. Read the books you never have time to read. What better way to spend a rainy Saturday afternoon reading your favorite book? 9. Spend hours just browsing the stores, not buying anything. Use it simply as inspiration and enjoying your own company. 10. Make new friends and keep an open mind. Give yourself time after a painful break-up to heal and at the same time, be open and friendly. You never know when you will meet the person you were meant to spend your life with. Or, on the contrary, you might decide after self-exploration that married life or being in a committed relationship is not your thing.
Make a commitment to yourself
Here’s wishing you lots of fun getting to know each other. Make a commitment to yourself to always honor your feelings, your body and your intuition. Thank you so much for taking time to read my latest blog! I hope it was helpful to you in some way! Be well and be safe!
Don’t suffer but rather be motivated! Schedule a FREE consultation today 561-299-1028 or visit my website www.NaturalStressManagement.com
Contact Mateja Petje
I offer FREE 15 minutes complimentary consultation at 561-299-1028 or you can email me at matejastriglavatgmaildotcom
Mateja Petje Website & Office Location Office: 5301 N Federal Hwy, #380, Boca Raton, FL 33487 (Boca Greenhouse Building, on US 1 just N. of Yamato Rd)
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Online Therapy with Mateja Petje during Corona Virus Pandemic
As I write this it seems obvious we are in a terrible place in a number of respects. One main reason I offer therapy online instead of meeting in person is for safety sake. Reach out to me if you would like to explore therapy options without meeting in person. My clients love many aspects meeting this way especially the convenience factor.